John Cleese Genius.

The English Office sent me this recently and, oh my, it made me hoot.

It's an article by John Cleese on different country's terrorist threat levels.

The shameless cutting and pasting starts here.

ANNOUNCEMENT

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have therefore raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re- categorized have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

And it goes on. I thoroughly recommend you go and read it. However I just have to throw a couple of other references. The Italians:

Italy has increased the alert from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

And the Australians:

"Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be alright, Mate." Three more escalation levels remain:"Crikey!", "I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend," and "The barbie is canceled."

And from the the Things-you-may-not-know-about-John-Cleese-File. His father's last name was actually Cheese, but his father changed the family name in 1915 upon joining the army.

Don't say you never learn anything here.