Nothing like a touch of festive Tourettes to spice up a supermarket visit.

I was walking in to the supermarket yesterday as an older man was coming out of it. He looked just like your Jo Average type, someone's husband, father, grandfather.

Until I heard him say to absolutely nobody (in a New Zealand accent), 'The only good Kiwis are dead Kiwis!'

I looked at him and carried on my way into the supermarket as he headed out into the sunshine.

However about two minutes later he appeared round the end of an aisle, looked at me dropped the c bomb as he walked by!

I was about to give it straight back to him when it slowly began to dawn on me that possibly things were not all that peachy in his attic.

I kept my head down and heard some more abuse from an aisle over and assumed Mr Wrestling-with-the-World was continuing in his work. A few minutes later I was over by the international section when he turned up again, yelling at a woman, 'Stop looking at me, I hate people looking at me! Especially women.' She then hurled back some abuse and he countered with, 'Oh I hate people like you, family people. You're all just so smug.' And then he marched off.

I went up to the woman and said, 'I wouldn't take it personally, he called me the c bomb, I think he's just a seriously good case of crackers.'

I expected her to say something along the lines of 'Thank god, I didn't know what I'd done to offend him.' But instead, she looked as if she was sizing me up to see if I was doing my own wee cha cha with reality and said, 'Riiiiiiight,' and walked off.

Which left me wondering if I had invented the whole thing in my head.

Until a guy came up to me and said, 'That guy is completely nuts.'

And made me feel a lot better about my world.