Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Off for a bit.

Right then, out of here for a week. Off to L.A for a work related trip. (No, I didn't love writing that sentence at all. Not one iota. Nope. Not one little bit. )

I shall leave you Box Kitty. And a pledge that will I endeavour to come back with some decent material so I can stop cutting and pasting ridiculous animal videos.

Have a good week !

Friday, April 22, 2011

How to make your job seem insignificant.

So there I was at work yesterday making (not very groundbreaking) television when I got a call from an old friend of mine.

She is one of the people who makes up the mortar and bricks of my life, I went to school with her, university, flatted after university etc etc.

She now lives in London and phoned about ten yesterday morning - and for some reason it was a terrible line.

'Wow, the line is rubbish, you sound like you're in the middle of nowhere.'

'I'm in Uganda, so, yeah.'

'Uganda? Why?'

'Setting up a school. Bringing a bit of help to a small piece of Uganda.'

It was at that point it dawned on me that my work efforts go in to entertaining people and all her work efforts are going into educating people who are less fortunate than she is.

I know who Mother Teresa would more impressed with.

Anyway, after nattering away for some time she said as we were winding up the call, 'So remember I'm setting up a school, not here getting a baby.'

'Well you could always get yourself one if you really wanted.'

'Everybody has been saying that to me. A woman even said to me today, (and you have to read this with an African accent),'You should take a baby home with you, we've got heaps!'

'She has a point.'

'No, I'm not bloody Madonna.'

I reckon Mother Teresa would like her even more.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Hangover Kitten

Further to yesterday's post I now present you I-drank-too-much-vodka-last-night-Kitten.
I have a feeling the only thing that is going to make Tosha happy is a big fat greasy fry up, two nurofen followed by more sleep.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Sorry Popbitch...

For shamelessly cutting and pasting again, but it's just too good not to.
My question is who is at fault ? Yappy Cat or I'm-a-plastic-bag Cat?

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Andrew Lloyd Webber, you've got a lot to answer for.

Just quickly checking in just so you know I'm alive.

I may be busy, but not too busy to jack some material from Awkward Family Photo.

Today it's awkward pregnancy photos.
I'm not getting the twin open shirts thing in this shot. And, where's her gun ?

As for the 'Cats' lovers....
I'm thinking that child is going to be screwed if it likes dogs.

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Hello Dirty Button and welcome to my life.

Boy oh boy.

Brother-in-law has just alerted me to Dirty Button, a place where you can waste all manner of time discovering stuff.

Like being really happy you didn't take this photo.
Funny Pictures
( I think after seeing that I would head straight for the drinks trolley and drink heavily).

It's also a site where you'll read about other people's misfortune:
Funny Pictures
And it's where you can discover videos like this.
It does make me wonder if history will ever allow the Spice Girls - or - a cover of the Spice Girls to be cool.

Even if it was done by boys.

Wednesday, April 06, 2011

Furthering your mullet education....

Doing research for my last post I happened across some other types of mullets which I feel compelled to share with you.

On Sunday I taught you about the skullet.
Which is where someone shaves their head but leaves the mullet.

BUT have you heard of the Forcekullet?
Otherwise known as the Bullet, the balding mullet. According to Mullet Junky it is when a lack of locks on top is compensated by letting the back give the bird to baldness.

Now, think just how much more interesting you can be at your next dinner party.

Don't say I never do anything for you.

Sunday, April 03, 2011

There is more to the mullet than meets the eye.

We've all heard of the mullet, right ?The hairstyle that's guaranteed to make you be ridiculed for generations to come.
There's even a website that lists The Top 25 Mullets in Rock History. They include pearlers such as Bob Seger. Woof.
And, of course, there's Michael Bolton's sensational Kentucky waterfall. And I'm really sorry I have to scare you like this, but Rod Stewart also has to be included in this mullet line up.
Sorry about that.

Okay, so I'm not sorry at all, I just thought if I had to see it, other people should have to suffer it as well.

Anyhou today the lovely People of Walmart have just introduced me to a version of the mullet that I wasn't aware of. Maybe you've heard of it.

It's the skullet.Watch out world, the skullet has landed.

Friday, April 01, 2011

Sensational Timing.

The Christchurch earthquake has affected so many people, and in such different ways. I was talking one of my oldest friends yesterday and it's almost like he's become evangelical about life since the earthquake.

He said that as he was trying to get to his son on the day of the quake he was making some major deals with the universe. I'm not sure if it's as a result of any of these deals (his son was fine, but it was a marathon to get to him) but he's loving the little things in his world.

Two days after the quake he was saying, 'The more days been today and the earthquake, the better!' And yesterday he was saying, 'A day where I have running water and power is a great day!' I keep expecting him to ring and tell me that the family are all off to build sewerage systems in a third world country. (Thankfully he's as practical as a chocolate teapot, so I think we're all safe there).

His wife has a jewellery shop and he was telling me that they were lucky enough to arm themselves with a police officer and get access to it.

In they went to get all the jewels out ...and as he was loading 16 kgs of jewels into the boot of his car (all by himself).... a bus load of police and journalists happened to drive by.

If his gorgeous wife had been at his side, I am sure he would been in the clear. However, without her, he might as well have had 'Looter' tattooed on his forehead.

The bus stopped and out jumped an officer of the law. My mate said he scurried as fast as his legs would carry him back to the shop to retrieve their officer to prove his innocence, before the police or journos started hurling dead cats at him.

Heh, some people would file this timing under 'Epic Fail', however I am filing it under 'Legend'.