Two days before Christmas from Jason the Chinese Mechanic:
'KATE! (capitals because he shouts)YOUR REAR BACK WINDOW MECHANISM REALLY BROKEN. IT'S GOING TO COST $500 TO FIX, PARTS ALONE. WHAT YOU WANT ME TO DO?'
On Christmas Eve, from your tenants:
'...and so we'll be moving out in three weeks.'
From your doctor.
'Sorry to tell you but your rib is cracked, you're about six weeks away from no pain.'
Things you do want to hear:
From the guy in the Vodafone shop after your Iphone is performing more like a heater than a phone:
'We can send it away, it won't cost you if you're within your warranty...let's check out when you bought it.....(inserts details into computer).....and you're within your warranty - by a day!'
From the guy in the Vodafone store three days later:
'Hi, just ringing to let you know your phone is back and fixed....oh no..... replaced.'
Sometimes the universe takes away, and then it gives it back. (Or, sometimes I am unlucky and sometimes I am a jammy bastard).