Saturday, February 06, 2010

Sometimes I get so lost when I am in the shower I need a map and a compass to find my way out.

I have a question.

Why is it that when I am in a rush and - regardless of how late I am running - whenever I get into the shower all sense of urgency flies straight out the window?

Every.Time.A.Coconut.

It goes like this.

Rushrushrushmust hurrydashingquickturnshowerondashdashhowmuchtimehaveIgot?Notenoughtolookatwatchisshowerwarmenoughyet?Jumpinshower....

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm lovvvvvvvvvvelyyyyyyyyyyy warmmmmmmmmmmmmm waaaaaaaaaaaaterrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr ruuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnninnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnng all dooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwnnnnnnnnnnnn me. Yummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Repeat at least three times, possibly five.

Turn off shower.Look at watch.

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckrunningreallylatenowdashdashdash....

It happened this morning, which meant I ate into my budgeted getting-lost time which meant Igot lost and arrived just a little bit late to location. But not late enough for anyone to mind.

But sometimes I really want to punch myself in the throat.

10 comments:

SaS said...

Maybe you should follow Jumpinshower with Turnoffhottap...

Illanare said...

I'm exactly the same!!

Janie Jones said...

Thank the stars, I'm not the only one.

This phenomenon also exists in my hemisphere. My ex called it the Janie Time Warp. It not only existed in my shower, but in any locale where it was imperative to leave soon. As in:

It's how late? I still need to get ready. It will just take a few minutes. No way I was in the shower that long! Wade, we've got to go now. Oh, crap, I have to let the dog out first. Shoot. Need to pee. Damn, what time is it? I haven't dressed yet, hang on. I've got to re pack the diaper bag it will just take a second. The elephant crap still has to be scooped out of the front hall before we can go. Etc, etc, etc.

So, I'd turn the clocks about 30 minutes ahead. Didn't help much.

I suspect if I had testicles instead of ovaries it would be self correcting.

laughykate said...

Sas, that's a great idea.

Ten bucks says I will never try it.

IIIanare, phew, you make me feel a little bit normal!

Janie,'I suspect if I had testicles instead of ovaries it would be self correcting'.GREAT line!

Jo said...

I do the same thing with internet checking and spot inspection... no matter how late, it ceases to matter...

laughykate said...

I am hearing you Jo. If only my time-waster wasn't on an activity that I do every day, I would be a hell of a lot more organised.

Megan McGurk said...

I'm the same.
Love the shower.
Hate baths though. Feels like a total waste of time.

laughykate said...

Oh, I love me a good bath. Not to clean myself though - to warm up.

Fat Sparrow said...

I plan on being in the shower for an hour. That's just in the shower, mind you, not the pre-shower plucking of scary hairs, not the post-shower cool-down, not the brushing of the teeth or the wondering why I have one single arm air that will get three inches long, just an hour to take a shower.

My family hates me.

laughykate said...

Wow, that's impressive Fat Sparrow. You must have a hot water cylinder the size of a small Pacific nation.