Sunday, March 08, 2009

Come back boy racers, all is forgiven.

When I heard that the Nelson police and the council were considering a cunning scheme to keep the boy racers out of the centre of town by erecting loud speakers and blasting Barry Manilow from them, I thought 'Genius! Why hasn't anyone thought of that before?'

Well, it appears they have. Three years ago in Rockdale near Sydney, the local council tortured
the boy racers with numbers such as Copacabana, Mandy, I Write the Songs, Can’t Smile Without You and Looks Like We Made It. Fortunately, while it did manage to send the boy-racers with their roaring engines and loud car stereos scrambling, it also managed to drive the residents in the streets vaguely insane.
I'm not sure which I would prefer - nightmares of Bazzer in his white suit (complete with audio) or the 'unst- unst-unsting' of thudding stereos accompanied by that god awful gear changing that baby bogans employ. She'd be a close call. Cause think about it - three hours of Barry Manilo from 9p.m every Friday, Saturday and Saturday. It's a helluva way to ruin an evening.

They're considering introducing the Manilo Method in Christchurch and Whangarei. You'll be pleased to hear that Dame Kiri Te Kanawa has been keeping vandals out of Waitakere City. However she can't take all the credit, Officers Mozart, Vivaldi and Tchaikovsky have also been helpful in keeping the scallywags at bay.

I was wondering what who would keep me going into an area. Or (more likely) make me shift if my street suffered from a weekly boy racer plague. Just off the top of my head - Enya would do it. Michael Bolton. And if I was subjected to three hours of Celine Dion, I think I would burn my house down.
Whose music would make you leave the area ?

10 comments:

Holemaster said...

James Blunt.

laughykate said...

Oh yes. Three hours of him and I'd be wanting to kill myself slowly.

Daily Daydreamer said...

Three hours of James Blunt, I think I'd rather a quick death! (you're blogrolled, love this post *L*)

laughykate said...

Why thank you! Yeah James Blunt, why is it that his music makes me want to punch him in the throat?

tinman18 said...

You MUST know what I'm about to say...

Nah, I haven't the heart to do it to you again.

Daily Daydreamer said...

He's just so miserable all the time...even when he's happy, he's still more miserable than the average person...

Holemaster said...

Because he's totally manufactured. Following a survey of 2,000 love lorn secretaries, they entered all the data into "garage band" and it spat James Blunt out.

laughykate said...

Arrrrrrrrrrrgggggghhhhhh Tinman, you don't even need to say it to kick that off in my brain. (Tinman reckons that way to get rid of any songin your head is The Proclaimers' I Would Walk Five Hundred Miles. And the way to get rid of I Would Walk Five Hundred Miles - concussion).

I reckon a mixed tape of Barry, Celine, The Proclaimers, James and Enya would be guaranteed to clear any area. War zones, even .

However, having said that I reckon some of the girl boy-racers (yes we have those in New Zealand) would like moanie old James.

Holemaster said...

I see Tinman's Proclaimers and raise his him..... BANANA Phone... dubey dubey dubey doop...

laughykate said...

The horror..the horror...