Wednesday, May 06, 2009

Move over swine flu, the sea lion is set for world domination!

Shucks, ain't it cute?

Apparently not, especially when s/he's playing chicken with the traffic.

This sea lion has made Bluff's Marine Parade his home for the last month and the residents of really sick of him terrorising the 'hood.
They've tried to get rid of him off the road in a number of ways, including the Bluff Fisherman's Store Station Manager Meri Leask giving him the full wrath of her garden hose at 7.30 a.m, in her dressing gown.
But s/he isn't keen to be moved on as apparently sea lions are territorial and once they form an attachment to a place they tend to come back, so the locals my have get used to s/he becoming part of the furniture.
I've done a few stories with sea lions in my time, they can be scary fuckers when they come lumbering towards you with their great big fangs and breath so bad that it reaches you a good week before the sea lions does.
I pointed their appalling state of their personal hygiene out to the local Department of Conservation guy who said, 'You'd smell the same if you just lay around and ate fish all day.'
But at least I'd floss.

8 comments:

Janie Jones said...

Wow. Now that's something I don't have to worry about, ever.

Now, killer Canadian geese and moose, that's a problem. And the occasional bear. You know, wandering the dark country roads at night hunting to take out the odd Toyota or Mitzubishi....

tinman18 said...

I notice it's referred to as s/he.

Guess it's too big & scary for anyone to get close enough to be more specific.

laughykate said...

Hey Janie, foul breathed, sea lions will give moose and bears a good run for their scariness money!

Tinman, yeeeeeeeup. Initially I referred to the sea lion as a he, and then I realised that there was no specific reference to it's sex cause, well, yeeeeeeeup.

Holemaster said...

Over here it's pedestrians who are the curse of the road. Irish people have a suicidal tendency to run full belt across the road just as the traffic approaches. We all laughed when the cops said they would enforce the jay walking law. That was 15 years ago and nothing has changed.

laughykate said...

Do you guys have a law against jay walking,as well?

I thought that was only the States. But then, have never claimed to be the sharpest tool in the drawer.

Janie Jones said...

I live in the US and I didn't know there was a law against jaywalking. Well, maybe in the BIG city. Like maybe New York. Or maybe Chicago. No one I ever saw wanted to try to jaywalk in Chicago. Chicago drivers would run them over.

Here in the Great White North if people see you walking along side the road and even think you _might_ look like you were contemplating crossing they stop for you no matter where you are.

laughykate said...

Wow, you're a polite lot! I generally can't get through a week without being honked at least once for my, er, rather haphazard road crossing ability.

Holemaster said...

We sometimes have to drive around sleeping golden retrievers.