One of the things I love about the Olympics is all the stories/scandals that come out of it. You jam that many people into one location, toss in the fact that they're amongst the most ambitious and competitive people on the planet, how on earth is that not going to be a fertile hotbed of senational gossip and epic bitch fights?
How much pleasure did we all get out of Tonya-don't-be-prettier-or-more-talented-than-me-or-I-will-get-my-ex husband-to-give-you-the-bash-Harding in 1988?
Or Zola Budd and Mary's Decker's did-she-fall-or-was-she-tripped collision in 1984 ?
If you look at 'Olympic scandals' on Wikipedia through the years you will find all manner of bashings, bombings and boycotts.
However, once you get up to 2004 you enter the era of the bannings and all the scandals have words with '-buterol', '-ozolol' and 'methoandrostenalone' in them.Makes for thoroughly dreary reading, after a while. I feel like saying, 'Lift your game people, drugs were, like, so last century, give us something new.'
And then along came the Chinese. The wonderful, wonderful Chinese.
God bless the Chinese, I say.
First up they fess up and admit that the amazing helicopter shot which captured the opening ceremony from the air was, um, actually, sort of, like, well, you know, computer generated. The fifty-five second sequence took over a year to make (and most probably cost as much as the fireworks display. Oh hang on, what am I thinking? This is China, labour is cheap).
Which begs the question -was the audience CGI'd in?
But my personal favourite so far this Olympics is that they fessed up that the cute seven-year-old who belted out a song at the opening ceremony was lip syncing - to someone else's voice!
Oh, I think that is beautiful.
Can't you imagine the conversation that went on?'Yes she sound good, but she got face like amputated foot. We don't want world to think we ugly. Pick a pretty one, we got millions to choose from.'
From here on in I think these Olympics should be known as the Keeping up Appearances Games.